Nothing marks the passage of time like having another birthday. The reality is, I've put another year to rest. When I think of how old I am, I simply refuse to believe it, and push it to the back of my mind. If I don't feel older, I don't have to acknowledge that I am older. Right??? As much as I want to ignore that my body is getting older, denial is not going to get me anywhere.
Other than looking in the mirror, I recognize the passage of time by noting the aging of my own children, and of course, my grandchildren, who are no longer babies, but boys, quickly developing into adolescents. I don't feel any older, but the proof is in, by just looking around. (How could they all grow up so quickly?) And oh yes, the recognition comes also by listening to my body. I must confess to the creaks, pops and groans that occur more frequently when I stand up, bend over, sit down, or just plain move my body. Sigh.
Another tell-tale sign of time passing is the simple fact that I am attending more and more funerals and celebrations of life. Last year alone it seemed I attended one at least every month, and sometimes more. I'm no longer scanning the obits looking for my parent's friends who have passed on, but for my own friends, and friends of my husband.
Even though I read that 60 is the new 40 when it comes to aging, for me being 60+ means it takes longer and costs more to dress and groom to meet my own (and perhaps society's?) expectations of what I should look like for a woman of my age. Oh my.
I am now looking at this getting older thing as a challenge, or more harshly stated, a declaration of war to keep healthy. I'm pretty sure that for me this fight will not include surgical intervention, liposuction or shooting-up with Botox. I'm not "in" to elective cutting or surgery. I'm talking about individual battles that may require mentally accepting reality, being physically as well as possible, keeping emotionally balanced, and staying alert and mentally challenged at all times. I think the battles will undoubtedly get tougher with every passing year.
In spite of all this, much of what will be my future is written in the genes. But I am hopeful that by continuing with a program of physical exercise, keeping my mind sharp through friendships, socialization, and reading, as well as my personal favorite, pitting myself against the pros on "Jeopardy," I will retain a modicum of dignity and grace as the years go by.
Of course I have no control over any of this! I must simply "get on with it." So, happy birthday to me. When I blew out my candle this year, my only wish was for the true blessing of life: another year of good health!
May you be blessed as well.
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